I am a recently-singled Mom with 2 children that I have home-schooled since they were babies. Now they are in 5th and 6th grade. My husband left our home 1½ yrs ago and has been unable to support us financially for much of that time. Even before leaving the house, he had been unemployed and our financial situation was a complete disaster. We had no reserves from which to draw. We only had the promises of God.
Of course, most people’s first question to me was, “Are you going to go to work now?” That was my first question to God, as well. I felt sick inside at the thought of it because I knew that it was God that had led me down the path of homeschooling long before my first child was born. He had so convinced me that homeschooling was His plan from the beginning, that I never questioned it. I loved being at home with my kids when they were babies and I couldn’t wait to begin teaching them about life.
While our family life was falling apart and everything was being shaken, homeschooling was the one constant we had. We would come together in the mornings, worship, pray and commit our day to God. We started our day feeding on the riches of His Word and then watched Him unfold His plans throughout our days. It wasn’t always easy or smooth. In fact, often it was quite difficult, but school provided a routine that kept us going.
After my husband left and moved out-of-state, I knew that my kids needed the stability that homeschooling provided. The last thing they needed was to be hauled out of bed early in the morning and thrown into public school. They needed something to be “normal.” I couldn’t see how me going to work was the answer. I kept asking God what to do and for the first six months, He provided a very workable solution. Friends of ours that homeschooled had just had their fifth child and were struggling with how to manage homeschooling the older kids while caring for the needs of toddlers and babies. I offered to homeschool their two older ones, and they paid me to continue doing what I loved. This was a win-win for both of us and the kids really enjoyed this time.
After the first six months, we had some big family issues that required us to pull back from teaching others and go back to nursing our own family. This was really hard because emotions were running high and funds were running very low. Thankfully, my parents stepped in to help us financially and we eventually got back to a normal school schedule. The question of how to survive while homeschooling was still looming large in front of me. It was becoming clear that my children had bigger needs now than they did when they were little.
I sought God earnestly. I prayed and prayed and yet I kept hearing God say, “Come away with Me.” Finally, I decided to listen and stop striving. I yielded to His call and sat as His feet. He began to reveal His great love for me in a way that was surprising. After coming out of a very difficult marriage situation, I found it hard at first to accept some of the things He was saying to me. He showed me that He is my Husband and I can trust Him. For months, I have been learning what that means in the light of my current situation. I have had no choice but to trust Him. This is different than it has ever been before. It’s easy to say you’re trusting God when you know you have money in the bank, or a paycheck coming at the end of the week. When you have no idea where the money is going to come from, it’s a whole different story. Yet His Word says, “No one who trusts in Me will ever be put to shame.”
Jesus has taken me back through my life story and reminded me of things I long since forgot. He has reminded me of promises He made to me long ago. He has brought back memories of things I used to really enjoy and let me see myself having fun! He is breaking me out of the constraints I’ve been in and showing me how to live again. Part of this process is finding the spot He has prepared for me to fill in His Kingdom. He is moving in the earth powerfully right now and He has a place for each one of us. He wants to heal us of our broken-heartedness and use those things that caused us pain to bring healing for others. In order for that to happen, we have to surrender our expectations and trust Him completely. He longs for our permission to take our world, turn it upside down and recreate it in His beauty. That is Kingdom transformation and it begins with us!
Today I am convinced that Jesus’ heart is for me and my children. He does not want them to go to public school and He is not telling me to go back to work a regular job. He is opening up opportunities for building wealth, which includes finances, but is so much bigger than that. It also includes helping people find salvation and greater intimacy with Jesus, healing of hearts, minds and bodies, and releasing creativity and purpose. Isn’t this the kind of job you really want? Don’t we all desire a job that brings joy to you and to others, a job that answers the question “what is my purpose on the earth?” I’ve always heard, “Do what you love and the money will come.” I believe that was God’s design for His people from the beginning.
So I want to encourage single Moms out there to press into God like never before. Gain His heart for your situation. Let Him love on you and remind you of all that He has planned for you and your children. Do not let fear drive you into some other place that is not on your path to destiny! The advice of family and friends is well-intentioned, but you and God are the ones that need to work this out. Jesus is our Bridegroom, Ladies! Abba Father is the best Dad in the whole world. With that combination, we can rest assured that they will care for us and our children better than any earthly situation can provide. We must be patient, willing to wait on Him, willing to let Him rearrange our thinking and our schedules and whatever else He wants to —-for our GOOD! It’s uncomfortable and difficult at times, but the end will be better than the beginning. Don’t just think about working a regular job for a small paycheck, but think about your dreams and what God has made you to do. Then seek His heart to bring those dreams to pass. He may really surprise you. You are creative, you are capable, and you are loved. He takes care of His children. Let Him lift you up beyond your expectations. Believe for the Best He has. Think big – not just surviving but thriving.
These are the things I tell myself each day. When the bills are piling up and when I have many needs, when I’m tired because there is so much to do everyday and when my children are emotional and needing support, I declare God’s grace is sufficient and He will lead me through into Triumph! He’ll do it for you, too!
Let’s take His hand and each other’s and make this the adventure of a lifetime! We are called to love one another and to encourage one another to good works. If you need support and encouragement, please contact me.
Blessings to you, my Sisters!